We've talked about BULLYING here before. BULLYING amongst teenagers has been getting a lot of attention in the news media because of several unfortunate incidents. I guess it's so EZ to put someone down because they may be different. I enjoy pageants. They've helped me over my shyness and reluctance to speak and appear in public. Beauty pageants are a competitive sport and no less demanding than any other competitive sport. Unfortunately because of being a "Pageant Girl", I've felt the sharp sting of a Bully's words and actions. Believe me, BULLYING needs to be dealt with imediately before it gets out of hand and unfortunate. Check out this article from PAGEANT PLANET one of my favorite pageant publications:The Ugly Side of Beauty
Posted by Steven Roddy on October 22nd, 2010 | Posted in Pageant Preparation TipsRecently there has been an outbreak of hate crimes against my girls so I thought that I would give you a little ammunition.What are these hate crimes I speak of? Typical high school drama where girls who are catty talk about other girls (meaning you) because you compete in pageantry, have goals, are charming and oh yeah, just happen to be beautiful as well.Here is the deal…being beautiful is a gift just like singing, writing or being able to play sports. Being beautiful can open up doors of opportunity for you that will be denied to others. When you are beautiful studies have shown that people stereotype you as healthier, smarter and wealthier than the average looking Sally (no offensive if your name is Sally).However, with every good thing comes some negative. Its the whole ying and yang thing that I am still working out.Because you are beautiful if you do not reach out to other people first you will be considered stuck up. If you pop an attitude then you are being a B%!*@. If you wear an outfit that flatters your figure then you will be marked conceited. And honestly the list continues…So what do you do about the negativity?Recognize people who treat you like this do so for basically 4 reasons:- Insecurity – When they see you they see what they are not. That scares them so they project the negative feelings that they have about themselves on you.
- Jealousy – Which is a quiet form of admiration if you think about it
- Personality Clash – Certain personalities clash…they get on each others nerves. This still happens to me. So I distance myself from people I clash with. Realize you can’t be friends with everyone.
- You pissed them off – If you did mess up (and we all do) then say, “I’m sorry.” If you didn’t then just move on and forget about it (Saying “forget about it” works so much better if you say it in an Italian voice)
Lastly, realize that small minded people focus on small minded things because they do not have a BIG vision for their life. Keep focusing on your BIG dreams and in doing so their voices don’t carry as much weight as they once did.
Recently there has been an outbreak of hate crimes against my girls so I thought that I would give you a little ammunition.
What are these hate crimes I speak of? Typical high school drama where girls who are catty talk about other girls (meaning you) because you compete in pageantry, have goals, are charming and oh yeah, just happen to be beautiful as well.
Here is the deal…being beautiful is a gift just like singing, writing or being able to play sports. Being beautiful can open up doors of opportunity for you that will be denied to others. When you are beautiful studies have shown that people stereotype you as healthier, smarter and wealthier than the average looking Sally (no offensive if your name is Sally).
However, with every good thing comes some negative. Its the whole ying and yang thing that I am still working out.
Because you are beautiful if you do not reach out to other people first you will be considered stuck up. If you pop an attitude then you are being a B%!*@. If you wear an outfit that flatters your figure then you will be marked conceited. And honestly the list continues…So what do you do about the negativity?
Recognize people who treat you like this do so for basically 4 reasons:
- Insecurity – When they see you they see what they are not. That scares them so they project the negative feelings that they have about themselves on you.
- Jealousy – Which is a quiet form of admiration if you think about it
- Personality Clash – Certain personalities clash…they get on each others nerves. This still happens to me. So I distance myself from people I clash with. Realize you can’t be friends with everyone.
- You pissed them off – If you did mess up (and we all do) then say, “I’m sorry.” If you didn’t then just move on and forget about it (Saying “forget about it” works so much better if you say it in an Italian voice)
Lastly, realize that small minded people focus on small minded things because they do not have a BIG vision for their life. Keep focusing on your BIG dreams and in doing so their voices don’t carry as much weight as they once did.
"Can't we all just get along?" - Rodney King
Until next time,
Kristyn Z
